Prisoner of the Mind

This Ache inside of me, 

Caged within my lungs, banging on the bars, 

Yelling for Freedom. 

I recognize her face—

Someone I knew, someone I loved, 

Someone who loved me. 

We used to laugh and share secrets, 

This Ache and I, 

And once upon a time, 

The lights go dim at Ground Zero, 

But the performers don’t perform, 

And the milkshakes lose their taste. 

She puts the needle on the record—

Our song plays, but I forgot all the lyrics. 

And the melody floods my chest, 

But I still can’t recall, 

So I drown in her sea of rage. 

Gasping for air, barely above water, 

A different Ache swims over to me. 

Another old friend? 

He reaches out a hand, 

But grasps only onto my memories. 

He strips them from me, 

Replacing them with damaged negatives,

In my spotless mind. 

The Ache smirks in vengeance, 

And swims off into the distance of Crescent Lake. 

I take shelter on shore for a fleeting moment, 

But the Ache returns, wearing a different face. 

Barely breathing, 

I cycle through Aches I used to know—

Each spears a blade through my bleeding heart. 

The pain makes me shriek, 

But my anger is louder. 

They don’t see the world through my eyes, 

They didn’t inherit my ancestors’ horror. 

I was born on one side of a wall, 

Where rivers of solidarity naturally flow,

Running like mighty currents,

Through every crevice of my Aching body.

So the Ache returns again—

This time, though, she sees her reflection. 

This Ache inside of me, 

—Is also me. 

When will she surrender?

To the made-up villains of her mind.